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Monday, July 9, 2012

"I AM WOMAN..."

...hear me ROAR!" (Helen Reddy, 1971)

Although it was Father's Day weekend, that weekend carried a very strong theme for me about the empowerment of women. Strange, yes indeed, yet very powerful and inspirational for me. It all began with an episode of Andy Griffith. The TV show ran during the 1960's, which was when the Women's Liberation Movement, or Second-Wave Feminism, began. In this particular episode that was on Saturday night, Andy was meeting with a lawyer about a case, and the lawyer happened to be a woman. Andy was very shocked to discover this, and so was his girlfriend Helen! There were many comments made throughout the show about how unusual it was for a woman to be a lawyer. Helen even commented that there were only about 2 or 3 in the whole state. That made me begin to think about how far our society has come, how drastically and quickly things have changed. I could name several female lawyers right now off the top of my head. Women do just about everything. I can't imagine living in that world when it was rare for a woman to do any job.

The next thing that happened was on Sunday morning. The very next morning, I was washing dishes and watching the CBS Sunday morning show. They did a brief story about Amelia Earhardt. I am a big fan. Maggie is named partly after her, Maggie Amelia. They keep reporting that they are finding artifacts and possibly getting closer to finding out what happened to Amelia. They also showed several clips and briefly discussed an overview of her impact on history. It still amazes me what a brave pioneer she was. I was in awe to see all the old news reels and thought about how huge it was for her to make those headlines. She was way ahead of her time. She lived during the First-Wave Feminism, which was mostly about legal issues for women, such as the rights to vote and own property. But Amelia was already performing a task that belonged to the theme of the second wave, which was more about women doing jobs and other things only men usually did. What a giant leap for women everywhere, for all time!

Later it came to my mind that I was asked my favorite question when I participated in the fair queen representative pageant in high school. Of all the questions I could have drawn out, I got my favorite one: What woman in history do you most admire and why? I contemplated yesterday morning how I could have changed my answer. The answer I gave then had to do with all the women of the American homefront during World War II. That is when women first really started going to work and having to do jobs that men normally did. While I like that answer, I also began to think about how differently I would answer it now, 15 years later. This is when my thoughts all came together. I suddenly began to think of all the women who have impacted my life, both in general history and personally.

I always tell people I was raised to be a strong, independent woman. The women in my family for several generations were all divorced, so they tried to raise me to not be completely dependent on men. I am very thankful for that, for the way my mother raised me. It is part of my personal belief system that we should never put our complete faith in any human being living here on Earth. The only perfect person who ever lived was Jesus Christ, and He died and rose again and went to live in Heaven. People are not perfect and they will let us down. Following that belief, I should only put my complete faith in God and what He does for me, and depend on Him for everything I need. I will never be let down by Him. But I also believe one way God takes care of me is that He sent me a wonderful husband on whom I can truly depend. Marty is our primary provider, and for that I am thankful. I would not have the life I have if it wasn't for him. The important thing to note is that I chose my life partner very carefully, and I believe I made the right and best choice. I couldn't ask for anything more. And I also believe he is a wonderful and faithful person. I believe in marriage vows and I intend to hold to those until the day I die. That is what marriage vows are for, that is what they mean. I have no doubt that he believes the same way. The problem with this world today is that some people (>50% of our married population!) don't think about what that means before they do it. A vow is a promise, hello! Don't make promises you can't or don't intend to keep! I know and understand, sometimes it's the other person. We put our faith in someone else and they let us down. We can't help what promises the other person doesn't keep. We each just have to remember to keep our own.

Sunday afternoon it really hit home when we were at Arkadelphia having a family decoration dinner with Marty's great-grandmother's family, the Stanley's. I watched Grandma Stanley sitting there by herself for a moment, just looking around, and I watched all the people who stood around her talking and laughing. And the great, gigantic thought hit me that none of these people would exist as they are without her. If it had not been for her faithfulness to her husband and her family, I would not be where I am right now. I have her to thank for my in-laws and my husband, and even my children! How amazing, how one single life, the life of one woman, could have such an impact on the world. At 92 years old, she is responsible for creating or joining the lives of probably 200 or more people. She had 9 children, and each one of those married and had at least 2 children. Just in Marty's family, his grandma is the oldest of her children, and she had 3 children, 7 grandchildren, one of whom is my husband, and 8 great-grandchildren with one on the way. That means that just from one of Grandma Stanley's 9 children, the oldest, comes 18 people just through her lineage, not counting the spouses of all those married! The impact just took my breath away.

I know it may not seem like so much to be proud of to some, because I know so many others have more and greater accomplishments in their lives, but I am still very proud of mine. When I couldn't decide what to do in school, I went to work. I got a job that led me to another awesome job God had in store for me. He directed my path. He opened those doors for a reason. I started working full time to get my own health insurance, which I still carry for my entire family today. I have already put 12 years into the state retirement system. I chose to go back to school when the opportunity arose (thanks to my Dad!) and I FINISHED. I have a 4-year college degree, a Bachelor's of Science in Elementary Education! I am the first woman in my immediate family to do this (I have a couple of female cousins who finished before me). I did it all while working to provide insurance for my family and raising our son. I am proud to share this accomplishment with my great-grandmother, Grandma Keener.

My grandmother told me that her mother went to college right out of high school in 1926. She worked doing this and that to pay her own way and she finished to become a teacher. It was rare during that time for women to attend college. What an amazing feat!

How does this relate to PKU, you ask? Well, I also realized that all the people who are responsible for Carson's PKU care are women. The doctors who were the pioneers in the discovery, treatment development, and testing implementation were all men, because that was before women's lib, second wave. However, today, one of the most important and influential people involved in PKU treatment is Virginia Schuett. She is the nutritionist responsible for creating the PKU Food List, which contains the phenylanine content of foods of all categories and brands you can think of. Thanks to her VERY HARD work and dedication, I can feed Carson all kinds of regular foods and have peace of mind to know how much I can give him. She also publishes the PKU Newsletter quarterly, which includes info on the latest research and food items, plus stories from kids around the country who have PKU. It is very uplifting for me to read and know what a normal life Carson can have, and hopefully will be to him when he gets older. Not only that, but she has also put together two amazing cookbooks for PKU, both of which I own and use regularly. All of this from ONE AMAZING WOMAN!

The other influential women in Carson's treatment are from the UAB Sparks Clinic in Birmingham. His doctor, Susan Lane Rutledge, is fabulous. She is a geneticist and a pediatric neurologist, among other titles I'm sure. I am so pleased to know that Carson is in the care of such a brilliant woman. She is always on top of things and wanting to make sure we check Carson out. I am a little concerned about his issues, and she was actually so uplifting last time we saw her. I am just glad to know he has a doctor who honestly cares about his well-being and is so interested in him. She also has a great team behind her. The nurse Barbara has always been helpful to me. The newborn screening director for the whole state, Alisha (not sure I spelled it right), was present the day they gave us the diagnosis, and she was such a comfort to us. She also delivered the news to me that Maggie did NOT have PKU. She has a special place in my heart. And last, but definitely not least, our favorite person is our nutritionist, Lauren Dodd. I get to hear from her every 2 weeks or so. She is the friendly voice who calls me to tell me Carson's blood phe level results. This week and last it was low, so we get to do a boost for a few days and check it again. She has always been there for me to answer my questions and find things out for me. And she is good to always make sure Noah and Carson have appointments on the same day so Julie and the boys and I can ride together. Lauren just recently became a mother herself, so I think she will be even more compassionate and able to put herself in the shoes of those of us who deal with these issues for our children. She is awesome.

What a bunch of AMAZING WOMEN, am I right? I am PROUD to be a woman. And I am so thankful that I finally have a little girl I can share that with! I always tell people I named Maggie in honor of "girl power" by naming her after two strong and independent women: My Nanny, Margaret, and Amelia Earhardt.



God bless ALL the wonderful women who have such an influence over our lives. Thank you all!

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